How to keep unexamined assumptions from limiting your growth

I inherited my Icelandic chickens from my chicken coach. When she started growing her flock, she ordered some eggs from an Icelandic chicken breeder and incubated them at her home.  When she gave me some of these chickens and my rooster, she told me not to mix them with any other breeds.  While my dream of being a chicken mama had not included limiting myself to Icelandic chickens, I trusted my coach and followed her instructions. 

Now, I will say that I’ve been happy with my Icelandic chickens: they are hardy enough to survive our brief, but sometimes intense winter storms, and their hens are known to go broody, making it easy and cheap to grow my flock. 

But, in recent years, as my broody hens haven’t been producing enough peeps to augment my flock, I have started to consider expanding another way: by adding some different types of chickens. 

This has me reconsidering my whole philosophy of owning hens.  If I’m going to get different types of chickens, should I still have a rooster? Why did I get a rooster in the first place? What happens if I have a rooster and various types of chickens? Will I lose my pure Icelandic breed?  Does that even matter? 

I started to wonder if the guidelines I’d been following when I first started down my chicken mama path might not be serving me anymore.

Like many of us, I’ll sometimes keep moving—making decisions based on a familiar set of beliefs—without ever stopping to ask whether those beliefs are actually helping me… or quietly limiting me.

Now, I know: my decision about keeping a rooster or trying a new type of chicken isn’t exactly life-altering. But the pattern is real. When I look back over my life, I can clearly see moments where I made truly significant decisions while operating under a set of beliefs I never questioned. In hindsight, had I paused long enough to examine those beliefs, the outcome might have been different. Sometimes it might have been better.

That’s the tricky thing about self-limiting beliefs. The biggest challenge isn’t fighting them—it’s not even knowing where they are, even as we unknowingly use them to make decisions. As I learned from Anthony de Mello, awareness has to come before action. You can’t change what you don’t see.

That realization led me to put together the list below—practical ways to help identify self-limiting beliefs before they quietly take the wheel. Here are some clues to listen for and questions to ask yourself as you work to discover your own self-limiting beliefs:

1. Over-Explaining

If you find yourself justifying a decision before anyone asked…

• “I would do this, but…”
• “Now might not be the right time because…”

👉 Over-explaining is often a belief in disguise: I need permission before I’m allowed to choose this.

2. Chronic “Not Yet.”

Self-limiting beliefs love delay.

• “After things settle down…”
• “Once I feel more confident…”
• “When the timing is better…”

👉 Ask: What am I waiting to feel certain about—and is certainty actually required?

3. Over-Preparing

Preparation can quietly become protection.

• Endless research
• One more plan, one more outline, one more scenario
• Feeling “almost ready” for a very long time

👉 Ask: Am I preparing to succeed—or preparing to avoid risk?

4. Strong Emotional Reactions

Big reactions often point to unexamined beliefs.

• Defensiveness
• Frustration that feels disproportionate
• Immediate shutdown or withdrawal
• Feeling “called out” by neutral feedback

👉 Strong emotion ≠ weakness: It’s often a signal that a belief just got poked.

5. Comparison Triggers

Comparison isn’t the problem—the meaning we assign to it is.

• “They’re just more confident than I am.”
• “That works for them, not for someone like me.”
• “They’re further along, so why bother?”

👉 Ask: What am I making their success mean about me?

6. “Same Result, Different Year” Pattern

If outcomes keep repeating, beliefs might be driving the bus.

• Same frustrations
• Same conversations
• Same goals that never quite happen

👉 Ask: What belief would have to be true for this pattern to keep repeating?

7. Absolutes and Labels

Beliefs love certainty.

• “I’m just not good at…”
• “I’ve never been able to…”
• “That’s just who I am.”

👉 Replace labels with facts: I haven’t built that skill yet.

8. You Confuse Comfort with Safety

This one shows up a lot in leaders.

• Choosing what’s familiar over what’s effective
• Avoiding a conversation to “keep the peace.”
• Staying busy to avoid thinking

👉 Ask: Is this actually safer—or just more comfortable?

Self-limiting beliefs aren’t loud. They’re familiar. They sound reasonable, responsible, and mature, which is exactly why they’re worth questioning.  If you are up for it, I’d encourage you to take a clarity break to learn what beliefs you are currently holding that are preventing you from growing into the best version of yourself. To help you along, I’ve included a link to a document to get you thinking.

Need help?  Reach out to me! I’d love to share with you how this exercise has affected my life.

Over the years of raising chickens, I’ve noticed they follow a rhythm that’s oddly reliable. There’s the season of egg abundance, when my hens behave like tiny, feathered overachievers and make me feel like the world’s most competent chicken mama. Then comes “broody season,” when at least one hen decides she’s ready for motherhood (whether I agree or not). And of course, we can’t forget molting season, when feathers fly, egg production crashes, and the hens look like they’re going through their own version of a midlife identity crisis. Conveniently, this happens just before winter, when egg production nearly halts.

Do I wish the egg-abundance season lasted all year? Of course. But nature has opinions, and apparently, she insists on balance. The only way the hens can deliver those glorious baskets of eggs is if they have a season to rest, reset, and rebuild. As much as I’d love to negotiate with biology… that meeting is not getting booked.

And if chickens go through seasons, it only makes sense that humans do too. The difference is: chickens don’t fight it. I, on the other hand, have been known to resist the “rest” season like a toddler being told it’s bedtime. I prefer to push, to solve, to move forward — even when life is whispering, “Slow down, friend.” But sometimes, the bravest thing we can do is admit what season we’re actually in and honor it. Even when it feels inconvenient. Even when it’s hard. Even when it is painful.

Right now, the days are short, and if you’re here in the Pacific Northwest, the sunshine has packed up and left us with a long stretch of gray. Everything in nature is exhaling… settling… quieting. This is the season of rest.

And here’s what I know deep in my bones: my best ideas never show up when I’m running at full tilt. They arrive in the quiet moments — when I pause long enough to hear myself think, when I create space for reflection, when I simply let myself be human. Spring will come, and it will ask something of us. It will require energy, creativity, and commitment. And to show up for that season well, we have to build our reserves now.

So, as you navigate this time of year, will you give yourself permission to rest? To breathe? To reflect on what you want and where you are going? Just as my hens take this winter lull to prepare for their next season of joyous egg production, I hope you use this time to prepare for your own season of joyful, purposeful productivity.

You deserve that reset. You’ve earned it. And your spring self will thank you.

Need help crafting what that rest looks like? Want to gain more clarity for the upcoming year? Please reach out to me, and I will share the valuable tool I have used for the past few years.

One of my favorite parts of being a chicken mama is hatching out little peeps. Just to be clear, I don’t hatch them out personally, but I love being a part of the process. Seeing the hens sit so patiently on those eggs for three weeks and then finally hearing the sound of the newborn peeps makes me so excited. I’m in my fourth “peep” season, and I have learned something every year.

This year, we had two broody hens, and we gave each of them about a dozen eggs to sit on. The first hen hatched out four peeps from her clutch, a 40% success rate (a few eggs were broken during incubation). The second hen hatched out three peeps for a 33% success rate. This is a significant decline from previous years. So, I started to wonder what was causing this decline.

Once I see a hen go broody, I will mark the eggs and ensure that she is only sitting on her marked eggs. When a second hen goes broody, I will mark her eggs with a different color. This means I knew the eggs were being incubated for the appropriate amount of time, so that wasn’t the problem.

I wondered if the fault could lie with my sweet rooster, Sven. He has been a great rooster – he isn’t aggressive with me and seems to be nice to the hens. He is a bit aggressive with the few cockerels that have been in the coop over the past two years, but that is to be expected.

Still, the dropping success rate had me wondering. Could it be time for another rooster? Maybe ol’ Sven is past his prime and it is time for a change. Right now, I have two young roosters in the coop with Sven and the hens. One of them is strutting his stuff trying to get to the “ladies,” and the other one seems to be pretty quiet, not making any waves in the coop. I definitely don’t want the “cocky” rooster, as I’ve had enough of that kind of aggressiveness. But I’m considering promoting my quiet rooster to be Sven’s replacement.

There is also another option, and that is to bring in some fresh blood. I haven’t supplemented my flock with any new chickens in nearly three years. And perhaps the inbreeding is causing my issue. Truth be told, people are always wanting to get rid of roosters.

So, here is my dilemma – promote from within or go outside to bring in a fresh perspective? I want to maintain a culture where good behavior is rewarded, but I also want to keep my flock healthy and thriving.

How many of you have faced that dilemma in your business? Promoting from within gives your employees an opportunity to grow within your company, while protecting your tribal knowledge and strengthening your culture. On the other hand, when you bring in someone from the outside, your organization gets a fresh perspective and potentially new approaches to the work you do.

One of my clients was struggling with this very dilemma. The owner wanted to place the right person in the operations seat, but preserving the culture of the company was also important to him. He tried to promote from within, but he couldn’t find the right person who really wanted the seat. So he began searching outside the organization. He found a promising candidate with a lot of great ideas to streamline processes and drive efficiency. But molding the new hire into the existing culture and getting him to embrace those core values was a challenge. It was a bit bumpy for all involved, but over time, the new operations manager smoothed his sharp edges and the employees started to embrace his fresh ideas. Slowly, the team grew closer, and the company became more efficient and, ultimately, more profitable.

If you are facing this issue, consider all the factors and then make a decision that moves you forward. If it turns out to be the wrong decision, you can pivot and try something else. If you need help working through this situation, I can provide an outside perspective to aid you in making the decision.

As for me, I’ve decided to promote from within. I want my current rooster to be given the opportunity to prove his skills. If I don’t end up with a better success rate for hatching out peeps, I will be forced to recruit from outside.

I started my Chicken Mama journey over five years ago. It all started with a desire to have farm-fresh eggs, especially after seeing my friends navigate being chicken mamas with such ease. I had help from a number of people, including my chicken coach and the chicken whisperer. My chicken coach gave me my first couple of flocks of chickens, taught me how to catch a chicken, and helped me learn how to deal with an unruly rooster. I’m so grateful for her support and encouragement as I grew from a city girl into a confident chicken mama. The chicken whisperer, also my neighbor, knows all things chickens. I remember calling her when I discovered one of my cockerels was walking like a penguin. She promptly came over, diagnosed the situation, and provided some recommendations on how to nurse this cockerel to health.

Mastery of a worthwhile pursuit is a lifelong journey, yet there comes a moment when you realize you’ve reached your goal. While we never truly “arrive,” we do hit a point of confidence—a level of proficiency where we can say, “I’ve got this. I can take it from here.”

I believe I have reached that point in my pursuit to become a chicken mama. Of course, I can always call my chicken coach or the chicken whisperer, but at this point, I think I can take it from here. One thing I have learned is that people sometimes come into our lives for a certain purpose, and when we achieve that purpose, they may move on.

One of my family business clients was struggling with the structure of the company while working through the right timing for the father to step out of the visionary seat and his son to step into the owner’s box. The problem: one member of the leadership team wasn’t the right person in the right seat. He didn’t consistently demonstrate their core values and lacked the necessary skills to fully own the position. The father and son really struggled with how best to resolve this people issue: he was a long-term employee and a family friend.

As they worked through the issue, they both started to realize that this issue wasn’t just impacting the company; it was also impacting this leadership team member. He didn’t love the work he was doing, and he felt increasingly uncomfortable with the culture the leadership team was creating.
So, they had the hard conversation with this team member. They talked through the issues they were seeing and gave the team member the option to move on from the company. At the end of the conversation, all felt relief and freedom.

This one change at the leadership team level changed the entire dynamic of the company. The leadership team was able to be more open and honest as other members of the team now felt comfortable sharing their perspectives. This allowed them to solve issues at the root for the long-term greater good of the company.

The end result? A healthier, more profitable company, which ultimately gave the father confidence to step away from the business and the son to step into the visionary seat. The bad news? They realized they had achieved a level of EOS mastery, and they felt they could take it from here. Was I sad? Of course, because I so enjoyed spending time with them. But I celebrated this breakthrough. EOS is designed to help you get what you want from your business. And once you get it, I want you to have the freedom to go live the life you want to live.

When you look at your business, do you feel stuck? Are you unsure how to get that breakthrough that you know your business needs? If so, please reach out to me. Together, we can decide the best path forward that allows you to get what you truly want from your business. Regardless of whether it is a phone call, a few coaching sessions, or a full EOS implementation, once you are “solved,” I will celebrate your success as you move forward, and I will appreciate the time we shared together.  

Hiking in the mountains is one of my favorite things to do in the summer. There is something about spending time in nature, with all the sounds, smells and sights, that just frees my mind, allowing me to get a new perspective on my business, my clients or even my life.

Invariably, my hikes take me through some challenging sections. Whether it is a climb up to a summit, a scramble down a treacherous decline, or even some rather monotonous prairie crossings, at some point I’m going to have to dig deep and find motivation to keep going. Sometimes the motivation comes from the promise of a breathtaking view of a mountain, other times it comes from the desire to improve mental toughness, and sometimes it is the promise of a cold beer back at the truck. And honestly, sometimes it is the simple fact that the path forward is shorter or easier than turning around.

During these hikes, it is not uncommon for me to reflect on my clients and their journeys, whether it be a challenging people issue, declining revenue or profits, or market uncertainty. I can see where they are and how they are struggling, and I think about how I can support them through this.

Paradoxically, my hikes and the challenges I face aren’t that different from the challenges that my clients face. Running a business is full of obstacles and frustrations, and sometimes my clients lose the perspective that these challenges won’t last forever. It may even seem to them as if they aren’t making any progress until, all of a sudden, they will hit a peak and the view will change, making, hopefully, the challenge worth the effort.

That is one of the privileges of doing the work that I do. As an EOS implementer, I have the gift of perspective. I’m not in the day-to-day, so I can see progress when, oftentimes, the client can’t see it. I can see leaders growing, leaning into the hard conversations, challenging each other. I can see my leadership teams tackling the meaty issues and slowly making change for the good. I can see the shift from fixating on the fires right in front of them to more broadly considering what’s possible.

As I reflect on the past quarter’s sessions, the main theme I see is teams who resolved some major people issues and started to look at the business with renewed energy. They made it to the summit, enjoyed the view and then shifted their focus to the next climb with excitement and anticipation.

Where are you on your business journey? Are you worn out from the climb, considering if it would be easier to turn around and head back to the truck? Or are you starting to see the view change, giving you energy to keep climbing? Maybe you’re somewhere in the middle, wanting to take a rest until you regain your energy for the climb ahead? Regardless of where you are, I’d love to join you on your journey. I can give you the perspective that you might lack, the motivation to keep going and the celebration you deserve when you reach your destination. Climbing is always more fun together! Are you ready to go hiking together? If so, send me an email.

P.S. The chickens are fine. They took a little time off and will be back next month.